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I really don’t know how to say this any other way. My dog decided to talk to me the other night and he had a lot to say. It initially played like any other night really. Once again, I was tossing and turning, in and out of sleep. I was half awake, mulling over my job situation: I want to make money writing but I need an income more. Then the most bizarre thing happened. “Hey human Bob! This is your best friend speaking! Wake up!” Who the hell was that? It was a deep, low voice; strong and certain with a hint of a bourbon induced slur. Sounded like Dean Martin actually. I immediately sat up. It was pitch black. The radio clock blurred 3:53 in a dull crimson light. All I could make out was the shadowy outline of Parker, my trusty beagle, sitting upright at my feet. “Hey boy, did you hear that?” I whispered instinctively. “Someone’s in the house.” My vision was starting to warm up to the darkness. Parker just stared back at me, his head tilted, his long ears hanging to the side of his head like hand towels on a wall. He turned his head to the bedroom doorway, lifted his nose to the night and sniffed. He turned back to face me. “Don’t think so.” I swore Parker spoke but it couldn’t be. I mean his hound drawn lips seemed to move to the words I heard but that was impossible. “Who’s there?” I yelled into the night. “Whoever it is, I am warning you that I am at this moment retrieving my loaded double-barrel twelve gauge from under the bed. I will shoot you. So leave now and I want to hear the door slam behind you.” I made some dumb noises in a lame attempt to fool the intruder into believing what I had just proclaimed. I took the ruse to the next level. “Okay. I’m fully armed and about to call 911 from my fully powered cell phone. Oh yeah, strong signal, four bars. Oh yeah, this is going to be a very clear 911 call.” “You’re breaking me up. Put the phone down human Bob.” It was Parker talking. I was certain of it. Nah, it had to be a sick trick. “Okay, good one Steve. You wired up the dog with a little speaker. Very funny.” My brother Steve was known to go to great lengths to pull off pranks. But I was pretty sure he was at his apartment in the city, sixty miles away, God knows doing what, and at 48 years old, unlikely to suddenly bother me with a prank—it had been 25 years since his last one. But the mind scrambles to the most implausible scenarios when so duly challenged. “Don’t think so. Nope it’s me, Parker,” the dog mumbled. I was positive he spoke again. By now I was sitting straight up, leaning towards him. He just sat there and looked at me with those big dark eyes. His poker face was on. “Parker? Are you talking to me?” “Well I’m not talking to myself.” I leaned back against the headboard. He yawned. “This can’t be. I’ve got to stop watching Animal Planet.” “Listen, I’ve got something to say and I’m not sure how long this talking stuff is going to work so …” “You are talking!” I interrupted incredulously. “Should you want I bow wow?” “Holy cow! Parker you are talking.” “Yup. But I’m not sure for how long. So can I say a few things before …” “I can’t believe this.” “Yeah I know. Either can I but if you don’t mind.” I looked at him with a giant smile plastered across my face. Parker can talk. The dog was talking. Who was I kidding? It had to be a prank. He continued. “I’ve been listening to a lot of that talk radio and that C-SPAN channel you watch while you write. I’m here to tell ya I don’t like what I’m hearing.” “You’re kidding me right?” “Afraid not.” Oh this was good. I was really hallucinating. Talk-shmalk, I had a few nagging questions of my own. “Hey, can I ask you something before you get to your stuff?” “Make it quick. I haven’t got all night.” “You like smell things a hundred times more than we do, right?” “Four hundred.” “Okay, four hundred. Wow! Then I really wonder about this.” “Yeah I know. Why do we like to sniff every morsel of excrement or yellow patch of urine we encounter on our walks?” “Now that you bring it up, yeah, why? It must smell like the inside of Dick Cheney’s or Ted Kennedy’s septic tank? And you know how much crap they’re filled with.” “That was a funny one human Bob. But it isn’t like what you smell. We pick up a lot more notes. It’s a broader pallet if you will. We don’t smell stink. We smell identity, mood, and illness. For instance, you know that crazy cairn terrier down the street?” “Yeah.” “She has stomach cancer and her humans don’t have a clue.” “You are kidding me?” “She probably has less than six months if they don’t get her to a vet soon.” He paused to lick his right front paw. “Yeah, and another thing. Don’t take me out at nights for awhile.” “Why?” “Cause there is a rabid possum living under the porch. That’s why.” “You know this from the smell of possum poop?” “Excrement.” “Whatever.” “Yup.” Parker yawned as if bored. “So is that it? Can I say what I need to say?” “Well there is that thing you do with that licking your, you know, your …” “Penis?” “Well, yeah.” “Jealous are we?” “Well, it’s just that …” “It’s all about keeping clean. Nothing pleasurable if that’s what you’re driving at. Nothing like what you do with your hand. By the way, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t pet me afterwards. Nope, no pleasure; it’s all business. You made sure of that when you had me “fixed”, remember. Thank you very much.” “Oh yeah, sorry about that. I had no idea you knew any different.” “No idea my butt. I’ll ‘no idea’ ya.” He paused again to lick his right paw again and then continued. “But I don’t hold it against you. We don’t hold grudges. Heck, if we did, we would have mauled most humans dead by now. Which brings me to why I am talking to you.” “No grudges. Really? I mean that “fixing” stuff is pretty serious. That’s pretty good if that doesn’t bother you.” “You done? Can I get to my concern?” “Sure. Sorry. Go ahead.” “How can humans be so smart supposedly, while they single handedly are destroying the Earth?” “You mean global warming?” “It’s more than that. It’s the air. It’s the water. It’s the dirt. It’s the forests. It’s the killing. It’s the anger. It’s the hate. It’s the grudges. It’s the fear. It’s everything.” “Oh come on. You’re being a little dramatic.” “We don’t know dramatic.” “Well give me examples of what you mean.” “First of all, the air is filled with danger. Dogs, cats, birds, animals of all kinds can smell it. It is our biggest topic when we get together.” “I don’t smell a thing.” “Yeah, that’s part of the problem. And you can’t taste the troubled water either.” “Scientists don’t seem to be complaining. So I should be listening to a dog?” “We have no agenda. Dogs call it as they smell it.” “ ‘call it as they smell it’; I’m suppose to just accept that?” “Yeah, there is a lot you should just accept.” “Oh yeah, like what else?” “Well, and here is what I think is the crux of the problem, you keep choosing the wrong alpha humans.” “What?” “You’ve got this alpha thing all wrong. Just because animals order their packs based on physical size and strength doesn’t make it so for humans. We do it because we are simple. You do it because you are thoughtless. That’s what we, and I think it is fair to say I am speaking for all animals, don’t get. Humans are able to think things through. But they never do. Well, that’s not completely true; some have but they are mocked or marginalized. An alpha dog barks and gets all puffy, like that wacky shepherd Sarge from around the block. The worst he can do is break out of his electronic fence and charge one of us. But you humans take it up a notch.” “Can you give me a for instance?” “God there are so many. Let me see. Okay, you’ve elected a president who pounds his chest and walks around like a gorilla with its arms all out to the side, all tough and all, carrying on with ‘bring it on’. When he jumps the fence, he brings tanks and bombs and humans loaded down in weapons and in body armor. Meanwhile, you have alpha males all over the place, flexing their muscle in their packs, threatening to obtain nuclear weapons, the great equalizer, giving the president one excuse after another to hop the fence. It’s nuts. And I for one am telling you, you’ve got it all wrong.” “Well, I don’t know what to say.” “You don’t need to say anything. Just start picking the right alpha humans; humans whose visions see beyond fighting, whose hearts hold no grudges, whose thoughts and reasons are not the products of testosterone, whose collective knowledge is rooted in the concept that true peace is never the consequence of war but the outcome of constant learning, negotiating and adjusting.” “This is what you want to tell me? Nothin’ for nothin’ but it’s a little heavy for a little chat with a dog at 3:30 in the morning.” “In a nut shell, yeah.” It was hard to accept this from my beagle. I mean, he’s a dog; a sleeping, eating, sniffing, crapping dog. I was chalking this whole episode up to stress. I was apparently snapping. “That’s it. I’m pretty much done. Just one last thing while I have the chance.” “What? World hunger? String theory?” I asked sarcastically. “You get the right alpha humans and the world hunger thing will take care of itself, smart ass. As far as string theory, who do you think I am, Hawking? I’m just a dog. No it’s more pedestrian than that, something I think you can manage.” “Then what, already?” I asked impatiently. “You know that thing you do occasionally where you empty the dish washer in the buff.” “Ummm … yeah I guess.” “Put some clothes on. It’s disturbing. I’m beggin’ ya, please!” “All right, but only if you lick your privates in private.” “I’ll see what I can do. No promises.” “So this is it? No more talking? You know we could make a fortune on Letterman with his stupid pet tricks.” “It’ll never happen. You see, this is a one time deal. Not sure why or how this is happening. Maybe that God guy is involved somehow. All I know is that when it is done, it is …” He abruptly stopped talking. “Parker?” Not a grunt. He yawned and as he did he stretched his front legs out and spread across the foot of the bed, his ears resting flat on the blanket. “Parker … are you done? Is that it?” He slowly closed his eyes and floated off to sleep. “Parker … just like that?” He began to twitch; in hot pursuit of a fox I imagined. “Holy smokes. I must be dreaming myself.” I curled back down under the safety of my covers, scratched my butt and thought about the conversation I had just had with Parker or myself or both. I sniffed the air. It smelled fine to me. What the heck was he talking about, ‘danger in the air’? It had to be a dream. As I drifted off to sleep, I thought about getting a real job real soon, apparently this writing stuff was getting the best of me. I also made a point to remember to talk to the owners of that crazy cairn terrier. I thought it was the least I could do. One can’t be too dismissive of the unexplainable these days. natural penis enlagement exercise natural penile enlargment penile enlargement tool vimax male virility sexual enhancement pennis enlargement review free pennis enlargement does penis enlagement work penis enlarement review

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Until recently, guys with premature ejaculation problems had to wait at least a few weeks to see results from natural solutions. However, new research has finally revealed why some guys last and others simply can’t. Based on the training principles of body building, it is now possible to teach your body how to have sex correctly through a serious of specially designed exercises. So what is premature ejaculation, and how long is really enough? Well premature ejaculation, or PE, is commonly defined as the inability to delay ejaculation to a point where both partners are satisfied; and this can be anywhere from 10 seconds to 10 minutes. It all depends on what you and your partner define as "too fast". Research shows that the average man will ejaculate within 1-3 minutes of penetration, while the average woman will orgasm after 12-15 minutes! With such a large gap it is no surprise that more than 30% of guys suffer from the anxiety of premature ejaculation! So how do you stop it I hear you ask? Fortunately, the ability to last a long time is a learned behaviour. Almost every man over fifty will tell you that he can delay ejaculation much longer today than when he was younger. Sexually inexperienced men have not yet learned to recognize the feeling of being about to come inside a woman. Recognizing and dealing with that feeling comes with experience. However, don’t be fooled into thinking that just having more sex will cure this kind of inexperience – it won’t! It’s not the amount of sex you’ve had – it’s the amount of learning and training. Learning to control the penis and taking charge of your own ejaculation are the keys to success. Using traditional methods such as the "Squeeze Method", the "Masters and Johnson Method" and the "Stop Start Method" usually takes a few weeks to see results. These methods are designed for you and your partner to simply get used to sex and that is often the biggest part of early ejaculation problems anyway. Fixing Premature Ejaculation with the help of your partner only makes it even more embarrassing and awkward for you and it’s no wonder these techniques take so long to see results! Doctors will sometimes prescribe medications that have ejaculatory retardation as a side effect. Even if those medications work (they don’t always), this doesn’t cure anything. You can’t stay on the drugs for a lifetime, and in relying on the external aid, you’ll never learn to control your orgasm for yourself. Also, most of these sprays and drugs simply numb the penis so you don’t feel the excitement. What’s the point of sex if you can’t enjoy it? If we change our approach to having longer sex by focusing on the actual love making muscles rather than just waiting to get used to coming slower, then results can be seen inside a week. In the sporting world, different training methods are used to build the two types of muscle fibres know as “fast twitch” and “slow twitch”. Generally weight lifters have denser slow twitch fibres for more power, and sprinters have denser fast twitch fibres for speed. If we apply their training methods to the muscles of sex, then we are able to develop total control much faster. Gaining control during sex is as simple as taking control over your breathing, and control over the PC muscle. The PC muscle is located between the scrotum and the anus, and contracts both quickly and slowly during sex. By training it correctly, premature ejaculation can be controlled far quicker than by simply waiting for it to happen with traditional methods. Also, anxiety is also a major contributor to fast ejaculation, and as a result your body tenses up and can’t perform correctly. By learning correct breathing techniques you can relax your body, and coupled with the confidence of controlling your PC muscle, you can be well on your way to stopping this embarrassing problem for ever! Outlining a full program to cure PE would take more than this article allows, however a basic program involves holding your PC for 10 seconds, then relaxing for a few seconds and repeating this cycle for 10 repetitions. You can also do short fast holds, for 20 reps each time. This will let you to begin to gain control over your PC muscle, and over time your PC worries will become a thing of the past! Believe me, everyone is capable of lasting as long as they want to, and it has nothing to do with you thinking that you are in some way different to all the other "normal" guys. You simply need to build new habits for sex and to understand how to control the correct muscles to last as long as you should be! free penis enlarement penis enlargement without pill vimax free exercise tip for penis enlargement cheap pennis enlargement manual penis enlarement vigrx oil penis enlarement surgeon penis enlarement picture penis enlargement pills review

There are a variety of ailments related to the heart and providing information on all the types of cardio vascular disease could be quite a task. Yet a look at conditions that affect the heart and blood vessels can give you a broad view of cardiovascular disease. You hear many terms like coronary heart disease , atherosclerosis or some other term and are left wondering as to what exactly all these terms mean. Medical information could confuse you. Triglyceride is simpler when mentioned as fat in your body. It is essential that you read and stay informed on some basic terminology. You could watch a few programs related to the heart and its working before going to your doctor. The word give the meaning as well; ‘Cardio’ is related to the heart and ‘vascular’ is related to the blood vessels. Diseases of the heart are many. Some specific types are Coronary artery disease Arteries supply the heart muscle with blood. Obstructions in the artery is a condition called atherosclerosis, is a leading cause of coronary heart disease. Coronary artery disease causes angia (chest pain) and myocardial infarction (heart attack). Coronary heart disease Coronary heart disease is a more comprehensive term. It collectively refers to coronary artery disease and its disease that are a result of the coronary artery disease like angia and myocardial infarction. Women and heart attack is another important aspect with the onset of menopause. Cardiomyopathy This refers to all diseases of the heart muscle. It deals with loss of heart muscle (ischemic), enlargement of heart muscle (dilated) and thickening of the heart muscle (hypertrophic). Another type of cardiomyopathy is an enlarged heart without a known cause (idiopathic dilated cardiomyopathy). Valvular heart disease The heart consists of valves that direct the flow of blood into and out of the heart. Diseases of the heart valves are due to conditions like narrowing of heart valves (stenosis), leaking of a heart valve (regurgitation) and if the closing of the valve is not proper (prolapse). Heart valves can also be damaged by other conditions. Rheumatic fever, connective tissue disorders, medications or treatments for cancer and even infections (infectious endocarditis). Pericardial disease Pericardium is a sac that encases the heart. This can get inflamed (pericarditis), stiff (constrictive pericarditis) or accumulated with fluid ( pericardial effusion). These may occur together after a heart attack or may vary due to conditions. Congenital heart disease Congenital heart disease develops in the womb of the mother, before the birth of the baby. Narrowing of the aorta (coarctation), holes in the heart atrial or ventricular septal defect are some congenital diseases. Detection may be at the time of birth or later in life. Heart failure Heart failure may occur as a result of other cardiovascular conditions. It is a condition where the heart cannot pump enough blood to the organs and tissues in the body. Due to this other vital organs do not get enough blood; causing shortness of breath, fluid retention and fatigue. Congestive heart failure is used if the heart failure as led to a ‘fluid build up’ in the body. Blood Vessels These are essentially hollow tubes that carry blood to the organs and tissues. The types of blood vessels are Arteries, Veins, Capillaries and Lymphatic cells. Disorders related to blood vessels that affect the heart are Atherosclerosis, Arteriosclerosis, Hypertension, Stroke (ischemic and hemorrhagic), Aneurysm, Claudication with peripheral arterial disease, Vasculitis, Venous incompetence, Venous thrombosis, varicose veins and Lymph edema. Diagnosis Diagnosis is based on a series of tests. Simple procedures are listening (stethoscope) to your heart, measuring the heart rate and the blood pressure. • The systolic and diastolic blood pressures are measured and are around 120 and 80 respectively for a normal heart. • Blood test to check for high cholesterol levels • Other tests are CPR testing which gives the state of inflammation of arteries. • ECG and EKG tests are where the electrical activity of the heart is tested to assess blood flow and heart rhythm. It is also done under stress at times to find out related Cardiac Arrhythmia ailments. • X-Rays are used to look at the structures of the chest (lungs and heart) to evaluate proper functioning. • Head- up tilt test is used to evaluate the causes of fainting spells. • Ultrasound/Echocardiograms give pictures of the heart chambers and its valves. A few other test methods are Cardiac Catheterization/coronary angiogram, Electrophysiology, Electron Beam (ultrafast) CT or EBCT, Cardiac biopsy (Myocardial biopsy), MRI scan and Pericardiocentesis. It is also important to take a look at high triglycerides as well as this often accompanies high cholesterol.