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Personal relationships can be seriously compromised by a continuing sexual problem. Such sexual dysfunction can cause terrible distress and can disrupt or even spell the end of personal relationship, regardless of which partner has the problem. Sexual dysfunction may be caused through physical problems but anxiety will often aggravate the dilemma. Sexual relationships are never entirely simple but they are very important and a source of much happiness for those in long term relationships. Many things, both physical and psychological, can go wrong and can threaten the fibre of the relationship if not dealt with in a proper manner. It is important for people to have some knowledge of what can impact on failure to achieve satisfactory sexual fulfillment. Such things can be caused by physical problems on the part of either partner or may be psychosomatic. Whatever the case, the problem affects both partners as such a relationship involves intense emotions and other mental factors. Factors such as faulty expectations, poor communication of sexual needs, ignorance, and concern over ability to perform can affect sexual function and satisfaction. Male Sexual Dysfunction Male dysfunction is most commonly in the form of the inability to achieve an erection or the inability to maintain an erection sufficiently to allow normal intercourse. This condition is known as impotence and can cause great distress to the male, not only because it prevents satisfying sexual intercourse but also because many men think it indicates a lack of masculinity. Most men suffer episodes of impotence at some time and these episodes are almost always of a psychological origin. Very few are attributable to disease and those cases that are, are usually among older men. Psychogenic impotence happens quite often because of performance anxiety. However, the majority of women do not place a great deal of importance on the occasional episode of impotence and are usually sympathetic and understanding rather than critical of their partner. They do not normally see it as a deficiency in the man’s masculinity. Sometimes, organic impotence can be helped by drugs like Viagra. In fact, it was only when Viagra was introduced to the market, the true prevalence of erectile dysfunction was revealed. Premature ejaculation, as its name implies, is when the male orgasm happens too early, thus depriving both partners of sexual satisfaction. This can even happen before penetration and is normally due to excessive excitement. This is fairly common in inexperienced men but will settle down as they become more sexually skilled. There is also a condition called Priapism that is potentially dangerous to the man. It is a rare condition in which the erection does not subside after he reaches orgasm. It is important that he seek immediate treatment as the blood in the penis will usually clot after about four hours, forming damaging internal scar tissue. The condition is usually treated by draining the blood under anaesthesia. Priapism has been known to be caused by drug abuse. Another disorder of the penis is Peyronie’s disease of which the cause is unknown. This disorder is characterized by a thickening and rigidity of tissue, resulting in a bend in the penis on erection. This can interfere with normal intercourse by causing discomfort to both partners. It may also prevent sexual intercourse from happening at all. The condition is often helped by steroid injections but surgical removal of the thickened areas is usually needed. Female Sexual Dysfunction Due to unrealistic expectations, many men see women who fail to achieve orgasm as being frigid. However, this often occurs because of a lack of affectionate expression by the partner, or a lack of sexual understanding and skill. Of course, there are other causes such as fear of pregnancy, recent childbirth, dyspareunia (pain during intercourse), and some prescription drugs. Drugs prescribed to treat conditions such as depression, insomnia, or high blood pressure can prevent female orgasm. Approximately ten percent of women will never achieve orgasm and around half never experience orgasm during sexual intercourse due to insufficient foreplay. Men often see the lack of female orgasm as a criticism of their own masculinity. Additional Sexual Problems Dyspareunia is the medical terminology for painful sexual intercourse which may be of physical or psychological origin. For instance, a woman who has recently had an episiotomy repair following childbirth will suffer from dyspareunia if she engages in sexual intercourse too soon. It may also be caused by infections in the uterus or the vagina or from rare congenital defects in the vagina. Pain can also be psychological and can be experienced because of fear or anger. It can also be an instinctive tactic to avoid unwanted sex. There is also an extreme condition called vaginismus which is an involuntary rejection of sexual intercourse and is difficult to treat. Sexual Therapy Those who suffer from any of the conditions mentioned may benefit from a referral to a therapist who will discuss treatment and options. Therapy can help couples overcome their fears of communicating sexual needs and their fear of rejection by their partner by using behavior therapy such as sensate focusing. This is generally a set of exercises that teach the partners to enjoy general body sensuality without intercourse. These exercises encourage a couple to enjoy body contact and sexual versatility and can help to overcome shyness which is sometimes still felt after many years of being together. 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Impotence occurs when one is unable to achieve or maintain an erection sufficient for satisfactory sexual intercourse. Although it tends to be more common in those who are over 40 year old, impotence can affect men of any age. A major study of impotence worldwide showed that over half of all men between 40 and 70 have some degree of impotence. At least one in ten men cannot get an erection at all. This website is aimed at helping those of us who believe that our penile size is insufficient to satisfy a woman fully and completely. However, if we have symptoms of impotence or erectile dysfunction, we should seek treatment for these conditions as soon as we can from a doctor. This is because impotence, even if it is just to the extent that the man cannot maintain an erection for a sufficiently long time during sexual intercourse, can also prevent a couple from having a fulfilling sexual relationship. Often, men will avoid sexual situations due to their emotional pain associated with impotence, causing their partner to feel rejected or inadequate. This also shows the importance of communicating openly with your partner, whether you may have symptoms of impotence or believe you have an inadequate penile size. A possible cause of impotency is premature ejaculation. This is the inability to maintain an erection long enough for mutual satisfaction. Primary premature ejaculation is a learned behavior that begins when a male first become sexually active. Like any learned behavior, it can be unlearned. Secondary premature ejaculation occurs when, after years of normal ejaculation, the duration of intercourse grows progressively shorter. This form of premature ejaculation is due to physical causes, usually involving the penile arteries, veins, or both. Other possible causes of impotence include performance anxiety, which is usually caused by stress or anxiety, depression, organic impotence, which involves the penile arteries, veins, or both, diabetes, nerve problems, drug-induced impotence and hormone-induced impotence. Visit Penile Enlargement Blog For More Advice. penis enlagement tool vimax penis enlargement vimax testimonials penis enargement pills review does vimax work vimax penis enlargement pills product penis enhancement system free penis enargement exercise penis enargement information

There are three stages of pregnancy. These are the first, second and third trimesters. The first trimester runs from week one to week fourteen, the second covers weeks 15 – 26, then the third is weeks 27 – 40. Week 1+2: This is actually before you get pregnant. It’s the stage where your body prepares itself by ovulating. And it’s in these 14 days that the egg is fertilized by the sperm Week 3: The fertilized egg now moves down the fallopian tubes, fluid passes into the ball of cells, dividing them into two. The inner cells will form your baby and the outer cells will form the placenta. Your body, at this stage, is still unaware that it is pregnant. The implantation begins as the cell ball reaches the wall of the uterus. In this process the cells actually bury into the uterus wall, which can sometimes lead to you having spotting. The implanted cell ball now becomes an embryo. Week 4: This is a week of rapid development, and your body now realises it is pregnant. The amniotic sac and cavity begin to develop and also the Yoke sac appears (this will later form the baby’s digestive system). The placenta now starts to form where implantation took place and blood from you will now go into the placenta. It is usually about day 27 that we start to feel the morning sickness. Week 5: The primitive streak (the fore runner of the brain and spinal cord) is now developing. Through this primitive streak the cells will develop into three layers: The endoderm: the bottom layer – develops the glands, lung linings, tongue, bladder, digestive tract, tonsils, urethra and associated glands. The mesoderm: the middle layer – forms the muscles, bones, heart, lungs, spleen, blood cells, and the reproductive and excretory systems. The ectoderm: the top layer – forming the skin, nails, hair, eye lens, nose, mouth, anus, tooth enamel, pituitary gland, mammary glands, and all parts of the nervous system. Other cells will be starting to develop the spine (called the notochord). The first steps towards forming the embryos head, and the first formation of the babies blood cells happen this week. Week 6: The first few days of this week is when your baby’s heart starts beating. The aorta (the largest artery in the whole body) will be starting to form at around day 40. By mid week many organs are starting to form: eyes, arm buds, liver, gall bladder, stomach and intestines, lungs and pancreas. Week 7: This is a busy week for your growing baby. During this week your baby will double in size. The lenses of the eyes are developing and there is also a recognisable tongue. The legs and arms are developing into paddles, the jaws are now visible. Week 8: The cerebellum starts to form this week. That’s the part of the brain responsible for the movement of muscles. Also hand and foot plates, elbow and wrist areas are forming. Towards the end of the eight week the hand plate has formed ridges where the fingers will be. There is further development of the eye; pigment is now appearing on the retina. Teeth buds are now forming within the gums, along with the wind pipe, bronchi, and voice box. The heart is now starting to develop the four chambers. Week 9: Your baby is now starting to form cartilage and bones. During this week the ovaries will develop into the sex organ determining whether you’re having a boy or a girl. The fingers and thumbs are now taking shape. Also the baby is now becoming more active. Week 10: It’s now that your embryo has become a baby, all be it on a rather small scale. There is a fully formed upper lip. The development of the heart now slows as it is past the critical stage. By mid week the earlobes are fully formed. Toes start to develop on the foot plate. As the bones of the palate (roof of the mouth) start to fuse together, the tongue starts to develop taste buds. Week 11: as the morning sickness starts to subside, you may feel your appetite increase. Your baby’s body starts to straighten. In males the penis is now distinguishable and in females the vagina is beginning to develop. This stage is where the baby starts to show individuality, as the muscle structure varies in each baby. Week 12: Your baby will start to develop fingernails over the next three weeks. The brain is now the same structure as it will be at birth. By the end of the week, the gall bladder and pancreas will be fully developed. Also the baby will now be opening and closing its mouth. Week 13: This week vocal chords will form in the larynx. Also the intestines will move from the umbilical cord into the abdomen, and will start to form folds and become lined with villi. Week 14: You may have noticed some changes to the areola (the area around your nipple); it may be getting larger and darker. Your baby’s heart beat will now be able to be heard using a Doppler. Breathing, sucking and swallowing motions will be being practised. The breathing practises will take the amniotic fluid in and out of the lungs. Baby’s hand also becomes more functional. Week 15: The baby’s neck is now defined, with the head now resting on the neck rather than the shoulders. The hair pattern of the baby will be defined by the 102nd day of the pregnancy your baby will now be able to turn its head, open its mouth, kick, press its lips together and turn its feet. Week 16: This week the baby’s toe nails will start to grow. The muscles will be growing stronger and the neck and head are growing straighter. As the uterus starts moving upwards you may start showing more, but this does mean less pressure on your bladder, making you feel like urinating less. Week 17: Your baby will be working on more reflexes this week; blinking, sucking, and swallowing. Development is carrying on with all the existing structures. Through the course of this month your baby’s weight will increase 6 times. Week 18: By mid week your baby’s eyes and ears will now be in the right places. The finger tips and toes will develop pads, and toe and finger prints will start to develop later in the week. Myelinization, a process of coating the nerves with a fatty substance called myelin which speeds up nerve cell transmission and insulates nerves, will start happening this week. Also by the second day of this week meconium (faecal waste) will start developing in the baby’s bowels. Week 19: A creamy looking substance that covers the baby’s body, vernix coseosa, will start to form. This protects the baby and its developing glands and sensory cells. If you’re having a baby girl primitive egg cells are now developed in the ovaries, in fact females are born with all the eggs their ovaries will ever have. Week 20: Most of the major development has now taken place, and the danger zone of the first three months is now over. Your baby will be waking and sleeping, just as newborns do. Also the formation of fine scalp hair and eyebrows will begin. Week 21: Your body is replacing the amniotic fluid very three hours at this stage of your pregnancy. Baby’s leg and arm movements increase as the muscles and bones become stronger. By the end of the week a stethoscope will be able to detect the baby’s heart beat. Week 22: If the baby is a boy, the testes will start to move from the pelvic area into the scrotum. The hair on the head and eyebrows is now visible as white and short. Week 23: The bones in the middle ear start hardening making the conduction of sound possible. The baby will start to gain some considerable weight between now and next month. The size of the baby’s body will start to get into proportion though the head will remain larger than the rest of the body. Week 24: The skin of your baby is wrinkled, but will smooth out as fat is deposited. Also by the end of this week the baby’s heart beat is so strong it is some times possible to hear it by placing an ear on your stomach. Week 25: Baby’s skin is now turning a reddish/pink as capillaries start to develop. The nostrils will now start to open, as they have been plugged unto now. The lungs will start developing blood vessels and the finger and toe nails will now be covering half the nail bed. Week 26: with the nostrils now open, muscular breathing will start. By the end of the week the lungs will be secreting surfactant, a substance which prevents the lung tissue sticking together. Also with the formation of blood vessels in the lungs, they will now also be developing air sacks. Brain wave activity starts this week for auditory and visual activity. Week 27: Bumping and thumping is becoming stronger as your baby grows stronger, you should be feeling around 10 kicks in a two hour period. Baby’s lungs are growing rapidly and there is continual development with brain patterns. Week 28: This is when the eyelids un-fuse and open up. Muscle tone is improving, and the lungs are capable of breathing air. The chances of a baby being born premature from now on, has a greatly improved chance of surviving. Week 29: Eye lashes have now grown, and although still unable to focus, baby’s eyes are now sensitive to dark and light. At this stage of pregnancy the senses of sound, smell and taste are developing. By the end of the week your baby will be able to move its eyes in their sockets. Week 30: Baby is now storing up nutrients taken in by you. Calcium for skeletal development, protein for growth and iron for blood cells. By the end of the week the languno (the small hairs that covered the baby’s body), is nearly all gone apart from some patches on the shoulders and back. Week 31: As the actual growth starts to slow down, the internal organs are still maturing, so make sure your still getting enough folic acid, iron and calcium. Should your baby be born this week they would have the ability to breath, see, listen learn and remember. Week 32: The baby’s iris is now reacting to light. All five senses are now registering with your baby, although smell is limited as baby can’t breathe air in the uterus. Week 33: your baby may now be sucking its fingers. Constipation could be starting for you as your uterus puts more and more pressure on your bowels. Week 34: The pigment of the eyes is not quite fully developed yet, this leaves the eyes looking blue regardless of final colour. And this week your baby will start to develop its own immune system. Week 35: In baby boys the decent of the testes will complete any time now. Your baby may now shift into your pelvis in a head down position, but not all babies’ do this before birth. Week 36: Dimples on the elbows and knees will be forming as well as creases in the neck area due to continual deposits of fat. Also this fat will help baby maintain its body temperature. Week 37: Around 85% are born within two weeks of their actual due date (either before or after), so as you enter this stage be aware for signs of labour. The baby is practising being more aware of its surroundings; this is the ‘orientating response’. This is where the baby will turn towards any source of light. The end of this week marks the end of development, growth will now slow down. Week 38: Meconium is accumulating in the intestines. Meconium is a dark green mass of waste product and cells from the gall bladder, liver and pancreas. Although shortly after birth this will all come out. Week 39: as the baby is settling into your pelvis, you maybe feeling clumsy and off balance. This is because your centre of gravity shifts. Make sure you’re prepared for your trip to the hospital. Week 40: welcome to the final week, that’s if you have not given birth already. Your body will be giving the baby antibodies so it can protect its self from many diseases. 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Dial 1-800/AIDSNYC Every Monday and Wednesday morning, promptly at 10 a.m., I leave behind my daily life and turn to volunteering as an AIDS Hotline counselor at New York City’s GMHC [Gay Men’s Health Crisis], the nation’s largest social service agency for AIDS. For the next four hours, my co-volunteers and I sit in front of a bank of constantly-ringing telephones, talking to men, women, and teens who call in from across the nation with urgent questions about AIDS, the ravaging disease that has left 13.9 million people dead worldwide. After almost 20 years, a whole generation, families are still facing the heartache of tending the sick, while scientists continue to be confounded by this stubborn, ravaging virus. Although the federal government currently spends$4 billion per year on AIDS research, and $15 billion worldwide, there is no cure in sight for the viral infection and no vaccine available. Small wonder that the GMHC AIDS Hotline, the nation’s first, is flooded with more than 40,000 calls each year. Listening to callers 8 hours each week, I often think the Hotline is actually a direct link to the soul of callers--an anonymous forum that allows each to reveal secrets and fears that they might otherwise never discuss with anyone. A Morning in May This is the way it began: “Good morning, GMHC AIDS Hotline, can I help you?” “Yes...I have a question...[hesitantly] My son...he’s 21...and he just found out...he’s HIV-positive [voice breaking] I’m.....alone, divorced. And I need some help...someone to talk to...” “Of course....happy to talk to you...it sounds like this has been devastating for you....” “It’s terrible. He told me two nights ago....he’s...he’s so young....I don’t want him to die. He’s my only child....why did this have to happen?” [crying] Her son, she explains, had sometimes neglected using condoms, convinced he wouldn’t contract HIV infection from his female partners. “How could he be so stupid?” she now asks angrily. “Why didn’t he know how to protect himself? I don’t understand. What am I going to do?” We talk for 35 minutes, and by the end of the conversation, I notice I’m barely breathing. The distraught woman’s anguish is palpable. Her situation is every mother’s worst nightmare.The life of her child is in jeopardy and she feels helpless and afraid. I can’t imagine anything worse. During the call, I do my best to employ the GMHC Hotline protocol of “active listening,” which involves using silence, empathy and gentle probing with open-ended questions. I’m also having my own emotional reaction to the panic in her voice, and I’m worried about whether I’m doing enough. Toward the end of the clal, when she exclaims: “I don’t want my baby to die,” my heart plummets: “I know....I understand that, but there is hope,” I tell her. I find myself on the verge of tears. The Bad News This mother’s story is too common. According to the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta, Ga., 40,000 Americans (half of them under 25) are newly infected with the AIDS virus each year. Unprotected sex and intravenous drug use remain the principal modes of transmission. “Teenagers,” notes AIDS activist Elizabeth Taylor, “are being very hard hit.” She refers to the three million adolescents who contract a sexually-transmitted disease annually. “Heterosexual teenage football players who are healthy and drink milk can get it too!” says the 71-year-old actress, who has singlehandedly raised $150 million for AIDS research. “But teens are very ignorant and feel invincible. They believe there’s an invisible shield protecting them from the virus, when it’s actually aimed right at them.” Taylor believes in addressing the problem head-on: “Tell your teenage son: ‘Maybe a condom doesn’t feel as good, but if it saves your life, it’s better than being six feet under.’ Intelligence must replace random sex.” Although a new generation of AIDS-fighting medications is prolonging the lives of thousands, nearly half of the 900,000 people infected with HIV in the U.S. cannot afford these drugs. Since the virus was discovered in l981, 410,800 Americans have died from AIDS-related complications, and the disease has left 13.9 million dead worldwide. Who Calls a Hotline? Not long ago I took a call from a 15-year-old boy living in a small town who said he feels guilty about his sexual attraction to other boys and is scared to discuss this with his parents. I ask him if there’s a school counselor or relative he might talk to, but he says he’s too afraid to confide in anyone. Being a teenager is hard enough, I thought, without the pressure of keeping this kind of secret. I felt angry and saddened that this child can’t comfortably discuss his feelings with his own parents. I encourage him to call the Gay Community Center Youth Program in a nearby city. In the meantime, I assured him that he could call our Hotline anytime, that we’d be there for him. This call was typical of the many we get from teenagers,whispering from their parents’ homes, confiding their blossoming sexual feelings and concerns. Our Hotline also receives calls from married men who phone from their offices, worried about extramarital sexual encounters; gay men suffering side effects from medications; mothers caring for a sick child or grieving for one lost to AIDS; even health care professionals themselves confused and requiring burnout support. One particular morning, I’m struck by the number of single women who turn to our hotline for help. At 10:15 a.m. a distraught young woman calls, explaining that she had been dating someone “very charismatic,” after a two- year period of sexual abstinence. “At first we used condoms and I was taking the pill to avoid pregnancy,” she says. But after her partner assured her he was HIV-negative, the couple began having unprotected sex. A few months into the relationship, she recounts, his behavior became “unpredictable,” until he finally admitted he was sleeping with other women and was addicted to heroin. Now she has to withstand the “terror” of waiting 3 months before getting an HIV antibody test. To help her cope, I give her the names of three terapists in her area. The call lasts 43 minutes. At 11:15 a.m. I take a call from a woman who is breathing heavily. She says that four months earlier she’d had a brief affair with a limousine driver, “not out of passion, but because I felt lonely. This was so totally unlike me,” she continues. “I come from a traditional Orthodox Jewish family...” Although they used condoms, and she has since tested negative for HIV, she feels deeply ashamed, and has stopped seeing him. And because she has both a persistent vaginal yeast infection and a rash on her neck, she’s convinced she must be infected by HIV. Although rashes, high fever, swollen lymph glands, heavy night sweats, sore throat, or other flu-like symptoms may indicate HIV, they can just as easily accompany the common cold or flu, or other type of infection. I encourage her to seek medical help and counseling, but the calls ends on a down note. “I must have it [AIDS],” she moans. I’m exasperated because it doesn’t sound that way to me, yet I can’t get through to her. The call lasts 22 minutes. It’s 11.38 a.m. when a well-spoken woman, who says she’s an attorney, calls from her office, asking for the names of anonymous testing sites. At first very businesslike, she calmly takes down all the information. I ask her why she’s considering a test. Total silence. Then she begins to cry: “I....I can’t talk....I’m sorry...you see, I have swollen lymph glands....[crying]....And my doctor wants to rule out HIV...I feel overwhelmed...” Then, abruptly: “Where can I send a donation?” She thanks me and hurries off the phone after just 3 minutes. These were one-time callers, but, as in any epidemic, an element of panic prevails, and our hotline also attracts an army of “chronic” or repeat callers who are intensely fearful no matter how benign their risk, many revealing continued misconceptions and paranoia about a disease that can be effectively prevented. We do our best to help them, but often they’re impervious to counseling. Most poignant are calls we get from AIDS patients, phoning from their hospital beds, attempting to navigate the exhausting labyrinth of insurance and health care matters. One man, in hospice care, said he craved companionship and missed the “good old days” when he was handsome and healthy. That call was a tough one for me as just the day before a close friend of mine, Joe, who had battled HIV for 16 years, had finally succumbed. Although at the end Joe was a mere skeleton, he was nonetheless at peace. “I’ve done what I wanted to,” he told me on our last visit. An avid gardener, he insisted on a final trip to his country house to see his garden one last time. For a moment the caller’s reality and the memory of my deceased friend blurred in my mind and I was overcome. Time for a break. Face to Face One of the most and unique services GMHC offers is called “A-Team Counseling,” a one-time, in-person session that’s free and anonymous. Recently, I was on an A-Team counselling a 26-year-old HIV-infected mother from the Midwest. She had traveled to Manhattan by bus to find her estranged boyfriend, who, she recounted tearfully, had kidnapped her 7-year- old son. Disheveled, painfully thin, the woman was a disturbing sight. She’s learned that the two had already returned home where the boyfriend was, and the child put in his grandmother’s custory. custody of his grandmother. Meanwhile she’d run out of money for the return trip, been refused a loan by her family, lost her ID, gone hungry and spent two nights on the street. Fortunately, this woman was registered at a local AIDS organization in her town. I telephoned her caseworker and persuaded him to buy her a one-way Greyhound bus ticket for $115.00. I also gave her subway tokens, a basket of food, juice and coffee. Smiling shyly, she thanked me for caring. Shaking hands good-bye with this woman was a bittersweet farewell. What will happen to her? I wondered will her health deteriorate or improve? Will she gain control of her life and be able to provide for her son? I’ll never know. One thing I do know: She’d appeared with the sorrow of a difficult life in her eyes, but when she left, she was elated at the thought of being reunited with her child. It seems that with faith and a helping hand, almost anything is possible. * * * * * 10 BIGGEST MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT AIDS AND HIV (This list would probably be most effective when presented in a vertical chart, the misconception on the left, the correct answer on the right.) 1)The AIDS virus can be transmitted through saliva, sweat, tears, urine or feces; also through deep kissing. 1) HIV can ONLY be transmitted through four bodily fluids: blood, semen, vaginal secretions and breast milk--and can also be transmitted from a mother to her child before birth, during birth, or while breast feeding. The exchange of saliva through kissing is no-risk, unless the saliva has blood in it and both you and your partner are bleeding in the mouth simultaneously. 2) HIV may also be transmitted through casual contact with an infected person. 2) You can’t get infected from toilet seats, phones or water fountains. The virus can’t be transmitted in the air through sneezing or coughing. You can’t get HIV from sharing utensils or food or from touching, or hugging. HIV dies after being exposed to the air. Therefore, touching dried blood on a shaving blade, a toothbrush or a bathroom counter top is no risk. In any case, unbroken skin is impermeable, like a rubber raincoat, and cannot absorb the virus whether it’s alive or dead. Blood transfusions and medical procedures in the U.S. are safe. Giving blood is completely risk-free. The chance of getting HIV from dentists or other health care providers is too low even to measure.You can’t get it from mosquitoes or other insect or animal bites. 3) Oral sex is just as risky as vaginal or anal intercourse. 3) Although not 100% risk-free, oral sex is considered a low-risk activity,except if: you have bleeding gums, recent dental work, open sores such as a herpes lesion, any cut, blister, or burn in the mouth, or if you’ve just brushed or flossed your teeth. Also, oral sex with an infected woman is riskier if she is having her period, since menstrual blood can contain HIV. Overall, latex barriers, (such as condoms or dental dams) used during oral sex reduce the transmission of not just HIV, but other sexual transmitted diseases. 4) Animal skin, latex and polyurethane condoms are all equally effective in preventing HIV infection and you can use ANY lubrication on the condom desired. 4)Only latex or polyurethane condoms may be used, as HIV can pass through an animal skin condom. With latex condoms, only water-based lubricants--like K-Y jelly or H-R jelly--may be used. No lubricants with oil, alcohol, or grease are safe.Petroleum jelly,Vaseline, Crisco, mineral oil, baby oil, massage oil, butter and most hand creams can weaken the condom and cause it to split. However, with polyurethane condoms, petroleum-based lubricants can be used. 5) Women have to rely on men using condoms during intercourse to protect themselves against HIV. 5) Women may employ the “female condom,” a plastic sheath that can be inserted in their vaginas and used for protection against HIV. It can be inserted up to 8 hours before sex, has rings at both ends to hold it in place and can be lubricated with oil-based lubricants that stay wet longer. In addition, women can carry conventional condoms for their male partners’ use. 6) If a woman is HIV-positive, her offspring will automatically be born infected with HIV. 6) With no medical treatment taken, about 25% of HIV-positive women will give birth to infants who are also infected. However, the use of anti-HIV medications has resulted in a significant decrease of mother-to-child transmission of HIV in utero and during delivery to less than 5%. (NYT 10/19/ 99]. 7) AIDS is fundamentally a gay disease contracted by white males. 7) Recent data compiled by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention indicate that young gay Hispanic and African-American men and heterosexual women are the fastest growing segment of the population being infected with HIV. Women now account for 43% of all HIV infected people over age 15. [NYT 11/24/98] African-American and Hispanic women account for more than 76% of AIDS cases among women in the U.S. 8) Heterosexual men are not really at risk for contracting HIV, even if they don’t use condoms. 8) The inside opening of the penis is composed of highly-absorbent, sponge- like mucous membrane tissues, which can provide a route for HIV-infected vaginal secretions or blood to enter the bloodstream. Proper condom use protects men from infection. 9) The AIDS epidemic is largely over because new AIDS medications like protease inhibitors and others have turned AIDS into a chronic, not a terminal disease. 9) In the U.S., AIDS is the fifth leading cause of death for people 25-44 years old. Roughly half of all those infected with HIV in the U.S. are not receiving any medications or medical care. AIDS now kills more people worldwide than any other infection, including malaria and tuberculosis.[NYT 11/24/98] In 1998 alone, 2.5 million people died of AIDS worldwide. 13.9 million people have died since the virus was discovered in 1981. 10) If you think you’ve been exposed to HIV through unprotected sex, you can take an HIV antibody test 2 weeks later and get an accurate result. 10) The standard “window” or waiting period remains a full 3 months. However, because the widely-used HIV antibody tests (The ELISA and Western Blot) have become so sensitive, about 95% of people will procure an accurate result 4-6 weeks after a possible exposure to the virus. * * * * [Note:The information stated above was reviewed for medical accuracy by Dr. Todd J. Yancey, an infectious disease specialist practicing in New York City and affiliated with New York Presbyterian Hospital, NY, Cornell Campus.] THE CHILD LIFE PROGRAM “Mommy takes a lot of medicine and Mommy’s really tired sometimes and she can’t take you to the park as much as she used to. It’s not that I don’t love you...and that I don’t want to...but Uncle Jack’s going to take you to the park today.” --A mother living with AIDS, a client at GMHC, talking to her 6-year- old son. In New York City alone, 28,000 children have been orphaned by AIDS since the epidemic began [NYT 12/13/98] GMHC’s unique Child Life Program serves HIV-infected parents and their children--who may, or may not, be infected with the virus. “We help families strengthen their ability to cope, relieve the pressure of parenting with support services, and teach parents how to talk to their kids,” says Child Life Program Coordinator Alison Ferst. “Unfortunately, should a parent or child be sick enough to be facing death, we also help them walk through it with grace and dignity---as opposed to feeling alone, isolated and frightened. “We also encourage sick parents to make stable legal plans for their children who may be left behind,” adds Ferst, “and to have disclosure conversations with the children in advance, so you don’t have a child standing at her mother’s funeral, not sure where she’s going next.” When an HIV-infected Mom arrives at GMHC to have lunch, attend a support group, consult with a lawyer, or access the acupuncture clinic, she can leave her children in a spacious playroom, decorated with fanciful murals and a giant tree hand-painted by the famed children’s story writer and illustrator, Maurice Sendak, who donated his art. [see photos] The program provides: child- sitting, nutrition services, a food pantry, art and magic classes, and recreational trips--church picnics, seasonal apple-pumpkin picking, amusement parks, zoos, museums, beaches. Also: homework help sessions, holiday parties, hospital visits, summer sports and weekly support groups for HIV- positive parents and their HIV-negative children. This unique program also features: Cooking classes for kids who sometimes prepare meals for sick parents; Pediatric Buddies, GMHC adult volunteers who play with sick children and also assist with family chores; Fun With Feelings Support Group, Friday Evening Family Time, Birthday parties, and a Holiday Gift Drive. “Children infected or affected by AIDS,” concludes Ferst, “want to be like other kids: They want to play with their friends, want to know that someone will always take care of them, want to know they’re not alone, and often wonder if it’s their fault when Mom or Dad gets sick.” These children need a helping hand and any of us can provide one.